My pain is my teacher

My pain is my teacher,

But I don’t know why it has to be, it just does.

My pain gives me lessons that I don’t want.

Sometimes I feel it does it just because,

but when I look deep, I know it’s not true.

It’s just hard to tell because it feels like a taunt.

It wants me to scream, and it wants me to yell.

Sometimes I can take it but often times I just fell.

Now my pain is back and it’s just as loud as ever.

I try to meditate to ignore it but im just not that clever.

My pain is my teacher and at first, I prayed for it to be gone,

But before the prayer left my lips I thanked God for what he had done.

I thanked him and I cried because I didn’t want to accept the truth,

The truth that my pain has made me who I am and for that I have already won.

Without my pain I cannot understand the power of suffering,

Without my pain I cannot appreciate the joy of peace.

Without my pain I could not help others,

Without my pain my empathy would cease.

I have done evil in my past,

Because of my pain that evil did not last.

How could I put pain on others while sitting in it myself.

I now realize that because of my pain, its others I must help.

So, if you hear me scream or hear me yelp,

Understand that I am blessed and not cursed,

I accept my pain, and I take it willingly.

My pain is my teacher, and it’s taught me the most,

That’s why I will continue to be its host.

My hope is that I live with it first,

So that you never have to feel the horror of its thirst.